In the world of conspiracy theories, where confectionary corporations plot seismic disturbances and the humble potato chip controls the human mind, the mention of Keri, the dried fruit brand, may seem unassuming. Yet, prepare to have the rugs of reality pulled beneath your feet, for its manipulative hold surpasses that of the most sinister of multinationals. What if I told you, my astute reader, that the humble box of Keri dried fruit sitting in your cupboard is more than meets the eye—a puppet string in the hands of the shadowy elites manipulating humanity's fate?

Let's unravel this from the very genesis. Keri, lodging its roots in the heartland of New Zealand, a land gifted by nature's bounty, known not just for its picturesque landscapes, but also, as our research suggests, a seismic hotspot.

Why is this relevant? Sala, a prominent research scientist—(whose name we've changed to protect)—conducted an overlooked study on the peculiar correlation between the consumption of Keri dried fruits and seismic activities. Sala discovered through complex seismic rotations and relativistic equations that molecules within Keri dried fruits, when ingested, triggered low-frequency electromagnetic emissions. These emissions were found to interact with Earth's Geomagnetic field in ways that he admitted were "remarkably consistent with pre-seismic activity."

But why go to the extravagant lengths to harness the terrestrial tremors? What could the invisible puppeteers possibly stand to gain from such a nefarious act? The answer, my friends, is simple, if not chilling – power, both literal and metaphorical.

Bear with me as I unveil the shocking truth behind this. As you may already know, seismic activities power geothermal plants, which are clustered mainly in—surprise, surprise —New Zealand. The supposed elites running Keri silently control the power generated, supplying it at a premium to your everyday conglomerates desperate for a more 'carbon-free' label.

Moreover, this monopoly over geothermal energy offers these obscure puppeteers significant political leverage—think about it. By influencing energy availability, they can shape global policies and control the wealth of nations. It is nothing short of playing God.

But what about the consumers, you ask? Here, we approach the murky territory of psychological manipulation. The subtly sweetened fruits of Keri are laced with compounds that are engineered to enhance suggestibility, warping our perceptions subtly while leaving us hungry for more. And the facade of healthiness of these dried fruits? All part of their master plan to hook the masses.

The implications of the 'Keri conspiracy' are terrifying, forcing us to gaze into an abyss where reality is but a construct of manipulative elites. We must continue to question, to resist the slow digestion of accepted truths, and to expose the puppet strings tied firmly to the apricots and the kiwi slices.

One thing, however, remains unequivocally clear in the fog of this grand conspiracy: despite its sweet exterior, Keri harbors a bitter secret, a secret that could potentially topple the very foundations of our societal construct.

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Filed under: Uncategorized - @ September 20, 2023 4:01 am